Hayley's story

A schoolteacher all his life, Garry's stroke was a massive shock for the family as he was "very healthy".

Unbeknownst to doctors at the time, Garry was suffering from stomach cancer, which would only be discovered a few months later. The cancer was thickening his blood and causing clots to form.

A hole in Garry's heart, which was also undiagnosed, caused the blood clots to travel to his brain and cause an ischaemic stroke.

After his first stroke, Garry experienced eye problems, particularly with his peripheral vision and had trouble judging distance and spaces.

"Dad would look down on a step and could not make out how close or far it was, which made him dependent on others when walking."

Four days after his initial stroke, Garry experienced a brain bleed and was flown from Kew Hospital in Invercargill to Christchurch Hospital.

Hayley talks about his subsequent 4-week rehabilitation at Wakari Hospital in Dunedin:

"He had to learn to walk again after his brain bleed and regain coordination on one side of his body."

Garry, who loved reading and listening to his favourite records, found himself feeling downcast from his inability to engage in his favourite hobbies.

A high school teacher and assistant principal at Tapanui's idyllic Blue Mountain College for 27 years, Garry was determined to get back to teaching and reclaim his life.

Garry's partner, Susie, was his main line of support during this time and her understanding and patience are hugely appreciated by Hayley and the rest of the family.

After making remarkable progress at home, Garry was unfortunate to suffer a second stroke in October 2020, causing him to lose his speech completely and combat severe bouts of fatigue.

It was only at this point that Garry’s doctors discovered the hole in his heart and how stomach cancer was forming clots.

After three weeks in hospital, Garry slowly started getting back his speech.

Hayley remembers how Garry was filled with remorse at this time, going so far as to tell her, "You don't need this in your life".

Garry had only been back home for one night when he suffered, for the third and final time, multiple strokes.

These final strokes incapacitated Garry, taking away his ability to talk, feed himself, see, know who he was, or recognise anyone around him.

"I flew down and spent a week with him at the hospital, making sure to cherish every moment with him."

"I cuddled up to dad and calmed him when he was confused and restless, holding his hand, playing his favourite music, talking to him, reassuring him that he wasn't alone, although I think dad could no longer recognise me at this point."

A few weeks later, Hayley received a harrowing phone call from the retirement village in Gore where Garry was receiving round-the-clock support, instructing her to come down as things were not looking good.

Hayley, who lives in Blenheim, says memories of the 12-hour drive to Gore are fuzzy, as she thought this might be the last time seeing her loving dad.

"I turned out to get one more week with my dad, which was a really special time for me."

On December 18, 2020, Garry Moody passed away, with his partner and Hayley right by his side.

Hayley who is working towards attaining a real estate license is a mum to five-year-old Charlotte.

"My little girl was really close to my dad, and she struggles not having him around anymore. Sometimes at night she walks into my room and tells me how much she misses him. Charlotte's only 5, but it reminds me that stroke doesn't just affect the person, it runs deep."

"When dad was in the rest home Charlotte was there with him, holding his hand and rubbing his face and reassuring him."

"Watching dad go through what he went through was soul-destroying. After he passed, I needed something to focus on and help me deal with my emotions. Running has been really good for my mental health and helped me push my boundaries."

Hayley is raising funds and awareness for the Stroke Foundation at the Queenstown Marathon in March. As someone who has never participated in a marathon before, Hayley has been training hard and recently clocked her longest run of 18 kilometres during the Christmas break.

"I've used my pain to drive me to do something I never would have otherwise."

"I haven't healed, and I never will, but I know that what my dad would have wanted is to see me focused on living."